I will never forget a speech my dad gave at my wedding. My dad, while always so loving and caring, is not known for being an emotional man, but the touching way he talked about me becoming swan will always stick with me. He held a vision for me that took me years to hold for myself.
At this speech he talked about how when I was a baby, I had this soft hair that stuck up and it reminded him of a baby duck. Now it has been years so I honestly can’t remember if he used the words “ugly duckling”, but we all got the idea. Then he went on to talk about how as I grew up I transformed into this beautiful swan. It made me cry that day and it still does to this day.
You see the idea wasn’t that I was ugly, the idea was that I had so much “beauty” in me that had yet to shine through. I believe that we all have this beauty inside us and through the transformation process, we can all choose to emerge as a beautiful swan.
5 Steps of the Transformational Process
Step Back– This is just as it sounds, we need to step back and observe our lives from a distance. This is because we are so close to our own lives that we can’t always see the truth of what it really is until we step back and look at it.
How to do it: Stand up, take three steps back, and look at where you were standing. What do you see in the version of you that is slightly in front of you? Write it down looking at yourself from a whole new perspective.
Let Go– This involves letting go in order to remove old beliefs about ourselves. Whether it be that we feel we are not good enough, thin enough, smart enough, pretty enough, not capable of following through, etc.…
How to do it: Make a list of what you feel you need to let go of. Now give yourself permission to let go of whatever has been holding you back.
Say Yes to Self: Saying yes to self-means that rather than holding on to your old beliefs, you now get chose what you want to believe instead.
How to do it: Look at the list from step 2 of things you are choosing to let go of. Now turn each of those things into a new POSTIVE thing that you get to believe instead.
Take empowered action- You need to figure out what needs to shift in your life in order to say YES to self.
Exercise: Look at step 3 and decide what needs to happen in order to start to live this new belief.
Get accountability– You need to establish some sort of support system in your life to follow through and hold these new beliefs as true. This needs to be someone that is going to see a vision for you that you may not be able to see for yourself. Someone that will push you when you start to slide back into old habits or beliefs about yourself.
Exercise: Recruit an accountability partner. This could be a spouse, a friend, an online community, or a health coach.
What vision do you hold for yourself?