My Story: Part 1
I took out my little metal box and added a snack size baggie of Doritos to the box of goodies. I can’t remember exactly what was in there, but I know for sure it included taffy and some other treasures I had been collecting all week.
See I was on another diet and I was only in the 5th grade! I hit puberty in the 5th grade and everything got out of control with my weight. I wasn’t necessarily big, but compared to so many of the girls around me, I really stood out. At least in my eyes. This left me feeling very insecure at a young age and shrinking back in hopes of people not noticing me.
My family was going out to supper to the local buffet in a couple of days for my parents anniversary, so until then I was going to work on losing weight. See the binging behavior at a young age? I was stocking up so that I could enjoy these precious snacks on a day that I was already going to be indulging. It is such a warped thinking that has followed me into my adult life. In fact, I still have to work hard to not fall back into this harmful behavior.
The night comes to go to the buffet, I was so excited! I knew all of the amazing foods I was going to eat which included fried shrimp, chicken dumplings in a thick gravy and that delightful cheesecake. I remember talking about that cheesecake all day long. The worst part is that its one of those no bake cheesecakes that I don’t even like today.
I am in the picture on the left. I am not sure how old I was, but I know this is when I was really starting to struggle with my self image.
And The First Binging Episode Begins
I knew I would be going off my diet that night so I went over to my little metal box and slowly started eating everything in it. It still makes me sad to this day to realize how much I was hurting my body. If I had not been depriving myself all week I wouldn’t have felt the need to binge and I probably consumed more calories then I would have if I had just enjoyed the snacks in moderation all week.
This was the start of many hard years of fad diets and binging. My biggest goal as a Health & Fitness coach is to help other women who struggle with this same problem. Not only do I offer support, resources and guidance, I am just there for them with a listening ear. Having someone who truly understands what we are going through is half the battle.
If you are struggling and need support, please reach out to me today. You are not alone!